I want to talk about games for a moment.
I actually have another piece I am writing about computer gaming that is very different than this, but for the moment, and for today, I want to talk about roles and stereotypes and so on.
Basically, most CRPGs and MMOs are based around what's called a holy trinity, which is Tank/Healer/DPS. There have been times that things have moved away from that somewhat (WoW did introduce a concept called scenarios during Mists of Pandaria in which 3 people of any class/spec could succeed, but even there some really benefited from a dedicated tank in there), but at the core, all end game content that isn't PvP is really designed with that in mind.
For the uninitiated:
Tank: basically a meat shield. High health, high armour, lower DPS, designed to survive big hits and keep enemies and bosses occupied.
Healer: does what it says on the tin. They keep everyone vertical, with emphasis on the tank.
DPS: the cannons that kill the boss. Often made of glass. They break easily.
When I started playing WoW in 2008, I had illusions of what a tank really was. How do you keep threat on something? By doing more damage than anyone else. I was shocked to find out when I was tanking I'd be doing the least (this has improved a LOT since then, but it was not until recently that tanks could be so competitive)...in fact, the first dungeon I tried to tank I tanked with a 2 handed sword because, when asked if I could hold threat, I said 'well, I have a big sword.'
I tanked basically non stop through the last year of Burning Crusade and all of Wrath of the Lich King. I took time off during Cataclysm as I was being less involved in guild activities...basically seeing myself frozen out of a lot of stuff. I came back at the end because a friend wanted a thing to play with me and so I picked it back up from the last content patch in Cataclysm and played non-stop through the first 3 months of the newest expansion.
I'd gone through a sea change tho.
You see, tanking is one of the two hardest jobs in the game, and I think heals tops it. If you're a good healer no one ever notices. If you're a bad healer, well...people notice. If you're a good tank everyone notices. If you're a bad one...it's bad. Really bad.
Because I started tanking in Burning Crusade, I have a different toolkit for tanking. I do line of sight pulls. I am more methodical because you could not pull an entire room and AoE (area of effect) them down. Trash had mechanics. You had to pay attention. Today we have a bigger toolbox for tanking...which I did not understand at first, but now I think makes all the sense in the world...I was super squish in protection spec and just...gave up. The stress had gotten too much, coupled with being in a progression guild for Wrath, and...
I just couldn't do it.
I mean to the point that I even stopped running dungeons and stuff as a DPS because I'd freeze up at the thought of zoning in.
In Legion, things have been a bit different.
For one, I have a dedicated healer with whom I am in voice contact. Add to that that we're a thing, and stuff becomes...verbal comm goes away? She knows how I pull mobs, she knows how I'll position and when I'll use cooldowns and that I WILL use my active abilities to minimise my incoming damage, and she can focus more on triage for everyone rather than dumping mass heals on be cos I feel I can pull an entire room and stuff.
Even tho I prolly could.
It means when I tank a dungeon it takes 18 minutes rather than 15.
But no one dies.
My pocket healer doesn't scream in my headset on every pull (which is fucking adorable by the way and makes me giggle).
Stuff gets done.
I love the ease of playing DPS, and I think I'm a better DPS because I tanked and tank.
I laugh about the fact that I pull a boss and the DPS runs around to the back...only to find that's where I already am because I am trained to face the boss away from the group. I guess that's not a thing anymore. It used to be.
I don't love tanking. I'll be honest, there are times I don't even >like< tanking. It's hella stressful. I do get very anxious. I would rather be mindless and just hit things hard with 7 foot long pieces of magicked metal.
But.
When I run 5 mythic dungeons in one night...and watch a tank pull things madly, leaving people behind...and a DPS who shall remain nameless but whose name might just rhyme with unruly might possibly get hit by a boulder and knocked into trash mobs that were never killed, which decide oops we're gonna eat you thank you...I realise that I can do a better job, keep myself alive, keep everyone alive, and not stress out my healer whom I eventually will be crashing out with.
Roles are hard...and tanking is a job that I associate with a still closeted Julie trying desperately to...something. But I realise also some of the best tanks I ever played with were women, and...this role is something I can do.
And with someone at my side to support, I can do it well.
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